I sat down to write this very involved, lengthy post about the events of this weekend and even a few tidbits from the week that I intended to share but never got around to. But then I got distracted by a huge, HUGE pimple on the side of my neck. Yes, I actually wrote neck, not chin or that weird spot by your ear that’s still your face. No, this is on my neck and I’m not 100% sure that it’s not a goiter. I am even tossing around the idea that it’s some sort of worm, possibly even a pregnant worm, that has made a nest in the side of my neck where she plans to raise her family.
I also have two smaller, but still embarrassingly large pimples on the front of my neck, too. As though the mother worm couldn’t wait to get to her nest and let two eggs out prematurely. My lengthy blog post was abandoned to go and ask Brandon if he thought it wise to go to stick a small pin in the side of my neck…just to see what happened because this neck pimples like this just don’t happen to middle-aged woman. And I keep referring to this guy as a pimple, but that sounds far too lady-like. If there is a four-letter word for puss filled orifice on you face, this new parasite I’m hosting would get that title.
I just wish that as long as it’s going to be a part of me, that it would be useful. Maybe it can lick envelopes or something because my Christmas cards ought to be here pretty soon.
My children haven’t mentioned it yet and I am trying to think up a really good explanation as to how and why it got there. For example, the Ebola scare really took flight around the same time that Reese was getting pretty invested in some nose picking. We may have hinted that boogers and Ebola were strongly connected and it may have worked out just beautifully that right around the time Reese was hitting the nose picking the hardest, he came down with a little virus. I realize that Ebola is nothing to joke about and a very serious matter, but my boys fingers are now spending far less time in his nostrils and I call that a win.
So again, back to the matter at hand – trying to figure out a way to use my neck pustule as a teaching experience. Some parents are using the “Elf on the Shelf” this holiday season to keep their children’s behavior in check. We are going with the “Defect on my Neck”. This is what happens when you eat too much candy and not all of your grow food, kiddos. Or if you don’t go to bed on time, Little Ones, strange things start growing out of you. Up the stairs we go now! Brandon has suggested that maybe it would be a fun outing to go and spend a little bit of time at a dermatologist. Sort of a field trip for Lila, the boils and I. We have lovely health insurance and I’ve got nothing but time (ha ha ha), but instead I’ve told him I think maybe I’ll just give it a little bit of time….just to see. Because that method of skin care seems to really be working for me.
I realize now that I have rambled on for an obscene amount of time about acne and that has probably been a waste of all of our time. So to try and undo that mental picture that I have done, let me leave you with something lovely, precious and pretty darn close to perfect.
My friend Julie, whom I am growing more and more fond of as the days go by, came over this past thursday and took a few family pictures for Christmas cards. Let me stop and say really quick that she did not do this because she just has ample free time on her hands either. This is the mama of 4, count them FOUR, kiddos (two of them being of the twin persuasion) and her plate is handed to her every morning already brimming. But she just picked up another plate and put a big ‘ol helping of me on there when I shot her a text Thursday stating that Brandon would be home for 3o minutes of daylight, could she maybe snap a picture or two. And snap she did, with her big daddy-I-Mean-Picture-Taking-Business camera with a lens that could have probably captured us easily had she taken the pictures from her house. She not only snapped, but she even edited them nicely and I love them. I would have been happy with a selfie on the phone, but Julie came over and made a little art project. Thank you so much Friend! And I think my own mama really thanks you, because I had just put on my big girl pants to tell Mumsey that I wouldn’t be sending out a Christmas card this year due to us just not getting around to a family picture and I could tell that she was not happy with my little announcement. One knows when they have said something that is not pleasing to their mama.
But I have restored favor with my mama once again, and Christmas has been saved. And thank goodness by abscess welled up 24 hours later. There’s only so much editing that can be done.
Happy start of a new week and tomorrow I promise to get over myself and my blemishes and get you caught up with stories and pictures.
Mama Tried 
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