Done….With Some Heart

It’s official, there will be no more Baughman babies – at least from this particular Baughman house.  There weren’t any plans for any more children anyway, but after I saw one of those threatening medical lawsuit commercials, you know the ones “If you or someone you love took blah blah while pregnant and had a child born with this terrible horrible birth defect, you may be eligible for blah blah blah.” Turns out Zofran, my pregnancy best friend, is now under fire.  I feel like I somehow dodged a gigantic bullet here because my babies were exposed to a WHOLE lot of Zofran in utero.

It’s funny, even though I don’t want to get pregnant and I don’t think we could handle a 4th child in this house, part of me has been very sad about there probably being no more babies for us.  I have been just a little on the fence, toying with the idea that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if there was a miraculous accident.  But after that late night infomercial……my decision was made in a matter of seconds.  Thank you science and the world of lawsuits to clear that matter right up for me!

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There’s a fever going around here in town…..that’s true in several ways because allergies are terrible and there is some sort of stomach issue that has plagued the kiddos in Reese’s class for a few weeks now…….but there’s a far less miserable fever as well.  Our Memphis Grizzlies have made it to the first round of the NBA Playoffs and in this city that often finds itself dealing with turmoil – we are all VERY united over our basketball team.  I have never before lived in a city that had a professional sports team of any sort and not having any basketball loyalties, the kids and I devoted ourselves to the Memphis Grizz.  Brandon is a half-hearted fan, his loyalties still lying with the Lakers, but he supports our support for the home team.

We don’t have flags on our cars, but we do have this guy in the front yard:

Quick little side story, this fantastic piece of NBA artwork was  painted by a young man named Dante who lives in the Binghampton neighborhood here in Memphis.  Binghampton is known for many different things here in Memphis, but their stellar extra curricular activities are not one of those things.  But thanks to the generous spirit of those involved with the Binghampton Development Corporation and countless volunteers, the Carpenter Art Garden has been created. The art garden is partnering with neighborhood children, and adults, as well as local artists, to highlight the beauty that can be found anywhere.  Even in a place that has been deemed at-risk, undesirable and even a lost cause.  Each Tuesday volunteers work with approximately 70 kids on art pieces that will stay in the neighborhood, take home pieces and of course their neighborhood garden.  These kids are getting to see their own creativity beautify their space.  They are getting the opportunity to not only fulfill their own creative dreams, but to see their hard work enjoyed by the area around them.  They are a part of something, something that is doing a tremendous work.  The Carpenter Art Garden has grown from just being a small afterschool activity to keep kids out of trouble, to a whole network for these kids and their families.  The house located right next door to the lot that had been used for the garden has been given to the group so that their activities can have an actual home.  Now, the kids have a place to go during the winter months, a meeting spot and a place to let their creativity thrive. Children can go here for small group art lessons, tutoring, and just a place to belong.

So let me get back to Dante.  Back at Valentines Day, these kiddos painted plywood hearts on stakes to be placed in the yards of their neighbors – just as a way of showing the love.  Many of these hearts were painted in your typical Valentiney fashion, but one young man decided rather than to go the red and pink route, he was going to paint his like the mascot of the Memphis Grizzlies.

And the crowd went wild!

I don’t know if people saw the heart and wanted one or if the artists working with Dante saw the potential for what he had just created, but either way they knew they were on to something big.  Over the past few months, I have noticed these “Grizz Heart” yard signs appearing in front lawns.  I also noticed that you couldn’t find them in any stores.  Finally, I just googled it and came upon news articles about Dante, his Grizz Heart and the Carpenter Art Garden.  Each heart is $30 and $5 goes directly to a savings account that has been set up for Dante. We excitedly called to find out how we, too, could get one.  Our name was put on the list (it was estimated we would have to wait 3 weeks – each heart is painted by Dante himself) and we waited. And this week, our heart was ready.

Reese and I took a little field trip to Carpenter Street and I think he was shocked by what he saw.  We live in a tough city, a city that has suffered more than its share of hardships and social injustice.  But we are separated.  My kids understand that there are children that need our help, that there is violence and as much as I try to keep the o’clock news away from them – they hear things.  But for the most part, their lives consist of living in a neighborhood of lovely, professionally manicured lawns, mamas that are always there to pick them up from school right on time, Fridays with special snacks of ice cream or cupcakes, and the cable and internet going out ruins their day. They have never needed a thing in their lives.  They have never gone without. And their daddy and I have worked very hard to keep it that way.  But I know it was very eye-opening to see that there is another side of things, right here in the same city.

When we arrived, there were farm animals everywhere.  Literally, goats tied to the trees and sheep being led around on leashes.  A local, traveling petting zoo had come to visit the Art Garden and the kids all seemed to be loving it.  And we got to meet Dante, the young man who created the sign that we had come to pick up.  I told him thank you and that we were so excited to put it in our yard, he just smiled. I hope one day this little guy gets to see who his city has embraced him.  I hope he understands that people are seeking out these hearts, not just trying to be nice to a poor kid in a bad part of town – but they are in high demand. He is good and has talent, and total strangers are proudly placing his artwork out in their yards.  I don’t even hang my own kids art work out in the yard! He is a part of something and his city is embracing him, whether he feels it or not.  I wish he could be driven around the Mid-South on a tour, to see where all his art has gone.  Everyone needs to feel important, like a part of something and that they have something to give that matters.  It’s not being given things that makes a person genuinely feel full, complete and capable…..it’s being allowed to give back that makes us feel like we matter.  Our place is important, we are important.  And I’m so thankful for places like the Carpenter Art Garden, to not only encourage this neighborhood and these families – but to encourage the rest of us.

I encourage all you readers, whether you are Grizzlies fans or not, get a Dante Grizz Heart sign and proudly display it in your yard.  Forget city-wide, let’s take this nationwide!

At last night’s Grizz Playoff Game

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And for your last little helping of Spring Break…….

Even though the kids seemed to have totally forgotten everything about our real life – they did remember that it was Easter and Sunday morning, I think it really blew their little minds that the mama Easter bunny had somehow managed to get their baskets in the car, in the hotel room and right by their beds without them seeing anything.

After our final breakfast at the Embassy Suites, we made our way outside to go and check out City Gardens.  I would like to say we did this because we are such lovers of art, but mainly it was because I had noticed that there were these huge rabbit statues there and I was bound and determined to photograph my children on Easter next to the giant rabbit statues.  Because obviously, that sort of thing is really important to me…….see previous post and my children atop giant turtle statues.

We did some posing……

There was some fountain jumping through……..

There was probably some crying because that’s just how we roll these days

There was a tough lesson that when you are in an art garden, things that look real might actually be considered “art”.  The 3-year-old had a very hard time understanding this concept, and could not resist the urge to gather the carefully placed plastic eggs.  And each time she was reminded that they were just for looking at, had nothing in them and needed to be left alone – you could tell a tiny piece of her heart died.

Don’t gather the artwork!

This picture is the story of our life – we thought we were done…..then came Lila

We did see this guy just randomly roaming the city.

He didn’t seem to belong to any one particular place or have any real agenda, which in hindsight, I now question the integrity of the vagabond Easter Bunny that I allowed my youngest to pose with.  A furry rabbit suit can cover a multitude of sins and possible felonies.

We also checked out Cardinals stadium.

We aren’t Cardinals fans

We aren’t even baseball fans

But it seemed like a good thing to do.  At least now we can say we did.

We ended our trip with a visit to the outlet malls where the craziest thing happened, we ran into an old friend who was traveling with her family back home after a weekend trip to Memphis.  Here we thought we had missed her due to our being out-of-town and we ran into her outside of the Disney Store.  I don’t think we could have managed that one better if we had actually planned it!

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So there you have it, you are all caught up.  Brandon is still not quite well, Reese stayed home from school today because he was afraid he might vomit and didn’t want to do it at school and Lila just got her nails painted and thinks it’s the greatest thing in the world.  For real, she woke up in the night just to call me into her room to show me one more time.

The current condition of my living room

HHHHOT Pink!

Now, have a great day and order your own Grizz Heart!

Almost Done…Almost!

It’s times like these that I could really use my sister-wife.  The husband has been out of commission for the last few days (at it’s actually legit, he has a doctor’s note and everything) and I have missed my co-parent, especially it being the weekend.  I don’t feel like I have been the nicest version of myself.  In my defense however, I don’t think my children chose this particular past few days to be the nicest versions of themselves either, so I don’t think I’m entirely to blame.  I never realize how often I send Brandon out to get little things from the grocery store, until he isn’t around to send out.  I feel like I have been to Kroger 700 times since Thursday and only purchasing 3 items at a time.  I don’t know what lays ahead of me for tomorrow, but you better believe even if it’s a matter of life and death, I refuse to set foot in a Walgreens or Kroger until at least Wednesday. I am putting my foot down!

On a less angry note, many of you know that I have a heart for all things nautical.  I have mentioned this once for 50 times.  And because they don’t just have stores that specialize in navy and white stripes, whale appliques and sailor collars, I find myself checking out places like eBay and etsy.  Places that you can actually type in the words “Whale dresses for size 2T” and they will have a whole plethora of seafaring clothing for your toddler.  I did this recently and came upon a darling little girls dress, navy blue with smocking and hand-embroidered whales in the smocking.  Be still my nautical loving Southern heart! I bid and I won and it arrived last week.  I was thrilled, it was even sweeter in person that it had been in the pictures – but what was that scent?  It wasn’t a bad scent, but a VERY noticeable scent, a very pungent scent…..it was a dryer sheet that had been carefully folded into the dress.  I’m sure that the sweet seller just wanted to make sure that it was perfect and presented to me the buyer in the best way possible, but I have to be honest – I am not a fan of the dryer sheet.  I don’t want to wash the little dress because it’s not really meant to be washed, with its delicate whale embroidery and all.  But I don’t want to hang it up in Lila’s closet either.  And I really don’t want her to actually wear it somewhere because nobody will be able to sit near her.  She wouldn’t be able to ride in the car with us!  So for now, the little darling whale dress is just sitting in my dining room where it can offend the least amount of people at a time.  Only the child who gets banished from the dinner table and has to eat in solitude really has to deal with the dress.  It’s not so much a bad scent, but a very overpowering one. Any suggestions of how to deal with an overly zealous little dress would be gladly accepted.

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I still haven’t finished about our trip to St. Louis and frankly, I’m over it.  I imagine you guys probably are too and figure if it wasn’t big enough news for me to share it 2 weeks ago, it probably isn’t worth mentioning now.

And you are probably right.

But I have more cute pictures and I really think at least Nana would like to see them.  So this is for you Nana.

Saturday morning, we enjoyed yet another complimentary breakfast.  This time, we knew how to navigate a little bit better and felt much more confidant about our arrival time and the choices we made.  After realizing that once again, I had packed things for my children to wear that were just a touch too warm weather for the actual temperatures we were experiencing – we packed our blue lipped children and headed to the St. Louis Zoo.  Which is free!  I feel like it is my job to tell you this so that if you live anywhere near St. Louis you can partake of this free zoo.  It is also my job to tell you that the parking situation is crazy when it’s a free zoo and Easter weekend.  Brandon actually dropped us off at one entrance to the park and ended up parking all the way on the other side and across the interstate.  There is a lovely pedestrian bridge that goes across the thoroughfare, but still that’s pretty nuts.  He also had to walk all the way across the zoo to get to us.  So a game plan about parking would probably be to your benefit when making your visit to the free zoo.

Also, keep in mind that when visiting a free zoo, there are all sorts of people who come out to experience the free-ness.  ALL sorts of folks.  The variety of people was great when A) none of the animals were out, but instead of growing restless and hostile, my children were captivated by the humans and 2) I have been trying to help Mattie to understand that though they go on your legs and fit like pants, leggings are not meant to be worn as just pants.  Leggings, typically, are meant to go under something else – like a dress or a tunic-type of shirt.  They are not meant to be worn as pants with your almost too little t-shirt.  Especially if they are white.  Strangely enough, this has been a very hard lesson for Mattie to comprehend but thanks to one woman in particular at the St. Louis zoo, it all finally made complete sense to Mattie Belle.  Lesson learned, message received and my child is now suffering from a tiny case of PTSD, but it was well worth it.

Where are we?

Being a seal

The real animals were a little scarce there for a while so we just had to make do

You turn your back for ONE minute! Thankfully, no one tried to buy her.

Mattie loving on a creepy statue of a man and a big snake

There was the CUTEST baby elephant that we gushed over

One of my favorite moments of the day was when we were admiring the zebras and Lila wistfully says, “I love to eat zebra cakes!” I’m not really sure if that was meant as a threat to the zebras or just a longing for her favorite Little Debbie snack, either way, it seemed a little offensive towards the zebras.  Then again, this is the same little lady who insisted on eating animal crackers during the entire course of her visit.  Riding in her stroller munching on animal crackers, that seems a little insensitive doesn’t it? There was also a point in our day that Lila noticed several people eating ice cream.  Each time she noticed, the longing became more and more real until eventually, but about the 10th person she was just about to lose her mind with everyone eating ice cream except her.  When she saw the 11th person, she done lost it.  We were walking towards the reptile house, Brandon and the older two a bit ahead of myself and The Hulk.  She “turned” right about the time we were walking right towards a group of young men that I strongly believe were engaged in a drug deal.  There were about a dozen of them, standing there doing their shady thing when this small, angry girl child begins stomping through their pow wow shouting, “I need ice cream NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

I was paralyzed

She was just out of my reach, but even if I reached for her she was still moving and I couldn’t quite get to her.

They parted the seas and let her march right on through, not speaking a word but all of them staring at this very determined, very small but mighty woman child clearly unphased by their presence.  Not just unphased but completely unaware.  Who cares if there’s a drug deal going down, the girl wanted some ice cream and decided the world needed to hear about it.

These legs look like they’ve been lovin’ lots of zebra cakes!

Trying to keep her away from her ganglife friends

She is scared of twisty slides, the garage, Reese’s brain hat, and this one weird glittery My Little Pony – but questionable characters possibly belonging to some of the finest gangs in St. Louis….hey if they have access to ice cream…….

Officially over the zoo

As we headed back to the car at closing time and crossed over the interstate, we noticed that the little park adjacent to the parking lot where Brandon had left out car was full of turtle statues.  Very, very large turtle statues.  There wasn’t really any explanation about the why, what, when, where and how of the ginormous reptiles – but there they were just the same and it only seemed right that no matter how uncomfortable the idea of a sea turtle the size of my house made me, I still needed to take a picture of my children on top of it.

So weird

So, so weird

These are the days!

Actually, these are more likely the days

Mattie, you don’t know how this repulses me.

They also played on a few snapping turtles and over-sized, though friendly looking box turtles.

Nothing makes a mama smile like photos of her babies in the mouth of a giant snapping turtle.

So disturbing

Just sittin’, and thinkin’ on my turtle

It was a weird, but appropriate ending to our day at the free and character-building visit to the St. Louis Zoo!

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And while we are on the subject of Saturdays gone by, here is a picture from this past one – in their Easter finery…a few weeks late….because that’s how we do things……..

Southern Spring greetings

Happy Tuesday!

Go Get A Snack, This One Is Long

I have reached a new low as a mother and a person in general.  This is something that I am not proud of, but feel like I need to be held accountable.  Now that Reese has started this whole soccer thing, it seems like we are coming and going even more.  We are logging at least 100 hours a week in the car (probably not, that might be a bit of an exaggeration) and it feels like I am continually packing up more snacks for our long journeys across Memphis.  The other day, as we were between activities, in the car and still about 2 hours away from dinner – one of the kids said they were hungry.  I reached into my the gigantic bag which now rides shotgun with me (filled with extra clothes, snacks, batteries, crayons, cleats, and a roll of duck tape) and came up empty.

We were snackless

No mother should ever be snackless.  Diaperless is better than snackless.

That is probably debatable to some, but I would rather have a wet car seat and a content child than a “hangry” on any day of the week.

And this is where I did something I wasn’t proud of.

Something that made Mattie vocalize how disappointed she was in me. “I can’t believe you just did that mom!”

I took a granola bar out of one of the Happiness Kits.

Happiness Kits are gallon size Ziploc bags filled with a pair of socks, a bottle of water, gum, a toothbrush and tooth paste, crackers, a granola bar – other things like that – that the kids have made in our Adventurers Club to be handed out to homeless people that we might see while at a stoplight or such.  The Happiness Kits are sacred and no one bothers them.  They are not to be moved from the car, EVER, except for in the even that they need to be deployed.  And here I was taking snacks from them.  I think Mattie actually referred to it as stealing the homeless people’s food.

And then I did it again after soccer practice when we realized neither Reese nor I had brought along a water bottle.

I have since repacked our Happiness Kits, but the memory of my actions has been burned into Mattie’s brain forever.

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Lila got a new bicycle helmet yesterday.  Just in time for her new tricycle skills and tornado season.  It has ears like a “catty” as she calls those animals of the feline persuasion.  She is very proud of her helmet and likes to wear it all over the place……and occasionally for a bike ride.

The helmet was being used as a holder for all of her grass, flower buds and sticks during this portion of her ride.  I figured if she fell, the mattress of grass would reach out and protect her.

While taking pictures of her in her new helmet, I couldn’t help capturing how long and luxurious our grass has become.  If my yard was a beard, I would be really proud of it – but it is not.

And I am not

Our yard is the result of what appears to be some extreme seeding and a very wet spring here in the Mid-South.  Which means our little piece of America looks much like a jungle and I am beginning to be embarrassed to leave and return to my house.  It was taking all the courage and humility that I had to sit outside while Lila rode around on her bike.  Every jogger who hustled by, every mom returning with her kids from school – I hung my head in shame as they passed by.  The yard surpassed that, “Their grass is getting a little long” point last week.  This week it looked like something really wrong must be going on.  I half expected the police to show up at some point to do a welfare visit, fact is, I am a little disappointed that they didn’t.

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Today as I was going through Mattie’s school folder, looking through her papers from the past week, I smiled as I came to the last one.  It’s always the last paper in the stack, folded in half.  I know what it is without unfolding it and over the course of the past two years, I have settled into the habit of not even bothering to look at the red marking on the left hand side of the page.  Instead, what I look forward to every Friday when Mattie brings home her spelling test is what little doodle she has drawn on the right hand side.  They started out small, a flower or a little star or something.  Some weeks they are for more elaborate, a whole little scene with several little characters and details.  Usually they depict what’s on her mind at the time, movies she is in to or books she’s reading.  There were several sad little girls with dogs shortly after Crosby died and often the people that she loves the most get featured in her Spelling Test doodles.  I wish I had saved more of them, or at least documented them.  Her own little journal of little girl thoughts and feelings expressed in the time it takes to give a Spelling Test, preserved on the right hand side of a piece of paper.

This was today’s:

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And back to Spring Break, I already shared about our fun and excitement on Wednesday (about 2 weeks ago) – remember the whole April Fool’s excitement? And Thursday we hit the road.  Awesome only goes so far in your own home.  The kids had been expecting a little trip and at the very last possible minute, their Dad planned them a doozie.  We headed to St. Louis – home of the infamous Arch, The Cardinals (who own our Memphis Redbirds), the free zoo, and American Girl Store and happens to be a quick drive north.

We realized something as we packed for this journey, and that is that we very rarely travel to some particular place.  Instead, our travels are typically to some particular people.  We also realized that other than our honeymoon, we have not taken a trip that was just our own family (whatever number we were at the time), that wasn’t either with family/friends, to visit family/ friends, or work related.  We are pushing 40 here soon and this was our very first trip where it would just be us!  That is both crazy and sad.

We made two stops on our drive, which is remarkable for us.  It is not uncommon for us to spend more time stopped than actually on the road when we make family trips.  The trip may have taken 6 hours but only 2 of those were actually with us in the car and it moving forward.  We reached our hotel, in the heart of downtown St. Louis and the kids were so excited!  We don’t do hotels in the heart of cities – we do airports to Nana’s house and late night drive’s that start with us in Tennessee and children waking up in North Carolina.  We do not do hotels with valets and doormen and elevators to fight over who pushes the buttons EVERY SINGLE TIME WE GET IN.

The kids moved in immediately upon our opening of the door.

Lila immediately told me that she liked our new house.

Reese and Dad admiring the view

And then we walked to dinner because there was no way any of us were getting back into that car.

We ended our first night with a bath in the pool.  Lila spent most of her pool time standing on the edge screaming, but for the few minutes that she actually got into the water to do her screaming, she let her brother swim her around which was the very first time that anyone has witnessed Reese holding her.  He has moved her from one place to another, and she has climbed on him, but he has never “held” her before.  What can I say, he’s a little slow to warm up to people – but when he does……………

After a fun night where we were gently reminded how lucky we all are to have our own bedrooms when we are at home in Memphis, we headed downstairs to the complimentary breakfast.  I was not prepared for the college cafeteria-like line that would await us.  Thankfully, the good people of Embassy Suites continue to serve as long as their company is still in line regardless of what the posted ending time is.  Reese made sure to proclaim very loudly that something was VERY wrong with the milk and nobody should drink it.  Oops, our kid is used to almond milk.  Carry on fellow breakfast eaters, the milk is fine.  “It’s from a cow though mom!” that is not okay!  It’s never best to eat near us, that’s just a handy piece of information I’m giving out.

Our fun for the day was a visit to City Museum.  I really don’t even know how in the world describe this place.  The best way would probably be for you to just google it and see for yourself.  Or better yet, just go to St. Louis and visit it in person.  It is an old shoe factory that has been turned into, not so much a museum, as just an urban playground of sorts.  Everything inside the “museum” is some sort of reclaimed piece of the city. Concrete, chairs, signs, rebar, buses and slabs of wall, everything came from somewhere else in the city and has been pieced together to make this crazy land of crevices, slides, caves and magic.  I tell you no lie, there was one point where I entered what appeared to be a whale’s face and ended up in a cave that then led me up 5 stories and there was a pipe organ playing cheery circus type music.  At about the 3rd story the smell of doughnuts came out of nowhere.  Hot, sweet fried deliciousness.  Then we went down a slide – a 5 story twisty slide.  It was the weirdest thing I have ever done while awake.

I tried to take pictures, but I don’t think they did any kind of justice.

We did eventually find the source of the sweet doughnutty smell.  A floor with the wackiest giant cog like chair things, burgers, a sausage statue, this whale thing

And a hipster man making mini doughnuts.  We paid him a visit.

After Lila played with some Legos the size of my foot

And the bigger kids played outside on a suspended school bus and a concrete ball pit, we eventually headed back to our new house.

Where the kids were greeted by maid service.  Do NOT get used to that one kiddos!  We took a little rest and then headed out for dinner.  This was met with much grumbling because the kids didn’t understand why we had to leave for dinner when just this morning there had been a lovely meal prepared for us downstairs.  It’s scary how easily they adapted into this hotel living thing.  No, we would not be eating dinner down there because A) the hotel didn’t prepare a complimentary dinner every night and 2) it actually did make dinner, but only in the very swanky restaurant that we probably wouldn’t be welcome in and didn’t want to pay for. They got very cranky when we asked that maybe they consider changing out of the manhole exploring clothes and possible combing their hair.

Mattie just about went through the roof when we were leaving and i suggested that maybe she would like to bring her dolls with us.  Tired, hungry and now fearful that her dolls may have previously been endangered when left alone in the hotel room, she was not in a very good mood as we drove away from downtown and closer to more suburban terrain like outlet malls and such.  She was in such a foul mood that she didn’t even notice when Reese very causally said, “Look at the American Girl Store, Sis.” She has become very good at completely ignoring him.

I was almost fearful of my life when we stopped at a Gap Outlet.

Let me just take a minute to tell future boyfriend/ fiancée of Mattie, don’t even bother trying to surprise her ever.  She is the worst at surprising.  She is not patient, she is not flexible and she will not play along.  She does not have a sense of adventure and if she is even the least bit hungry, tired or cold, she will probably say some very unkind things to you.  By the time you actually get to reveal your surprise, she will have been so difficult that you probably don’t want to give her the planned surprise at all.  I have a feeling Mattie is going to botch several proposals and have no idea.  Botching not just the proposal but the relationships entirely.  She will wonder “what ever happened to so-and-so” and we will all know, but her.

We had stopped at the Gap to kill some time, because unbeknownst to Matilda, her mother had wrangled dinner reservations for us at the American Girl Bistro – which has been her dream ever since she discovered that American Girl stores had bistros.  She has fantasized about the little doll chair and the little doll place settings.  It probably comes up at least once a week. When we found out there would be an American Girl store coming to Nashville that was her first question, “Does it have the restaurant?”  Followed by, “Do they have the doll chairs and little plates and cups?” This has been a very big deal for her. But because she had low-blood sugar induced hate towards all of us, she hadn’t even notice the bright pink building next to The Cheesecake Factory (which beckoned to me!).

When time had been adequately killed, we made our way to her surprise.  We were all waiting on pins and needles for it to all finally click in her little head.  Wait for it, wait for it…..here is it comes…..and then it hit, “Oh Mama, it’s an AG store!!!!!!!!!Did you know there was one here!!!!!! We’re stopping!!!!!!!That’s why you made me bring my dolls!!!!!!!!”  wait about 2 seconds more and then she actually screamed, “They have the restaurant don’t they and that’s why we aren’t eating at the hotel!!!!! (well, not exactly why Mattie but sure, whatever…..go with that.) And then she was gone.  I really thought we had the child locks set on the car but I guess not.

She was beaming, Lila was pretty excited, too.  And they were wearing matching dresses which pleased them both, as well.

The dolls sat at the table with us in the their special chairs and had their own little place settings, just like Mattie had envisioned.  I would not go there hungry or without planning on throwing down a little more cash then you would like.  I’m not talking steakhouse prices here or anything but my seasonal fruit kabobs (which were 4 pieces of fruit on each kabob, a flick of yogurt and two tiny mini muffins were about $7.95.  I breathed in and it was all gone.  I probably could have ordered and devoured 7 orders of that.  They are definitely catering to their clietele, and that is okay, because like I said, there was a Cheesecake Factory next door and while Mattie was later making her rounds through the store, Brandon was placing a to-go order for he and I.

They brought a boy doll because we had a boy without a doll at our table.  Our boy was very polite and said that he did not wish to have the doll sit next to him, so instead, they sat “Sherman” next to Brandon.  Reese handled the whole situation very uncomfortably, but without any complaints.  He looked about as pained to be in the bright pink store as I remember my brother being when he would somehow find himself in a Victoria’s Secret.  Scared to touch anything and standing so still so as not to draw any unnecessary attention.  Way to take one for the team, Reese.

A pretty Awesome Day!

Can’t Breath

Monday night, from two weeks ago, ended with a very allergy-attacked Mattie.  Turns out that a day of outdoor fun at the zoo, full of animal dander and newly released pollen and followed up with an hour outside at her brother’s soccer practice wasn’t the best thing for Mattie Belle’s sinuses….or her eyes……or any portion of her head.  I sent her to bed with some Benadryl and my fingers crossed that sleep and drugs would do the trick.

Finger Crossing doesn’t work

She woke up at around 6 in the morning all sorts of congested and itchy and miserable.  I dosed her with some more Benadryl and remarked out loud to her father that what we really needed was some of the non-Meth-making Sudafed to clear that girl’s nose up.  I got back in bed, muttering about there not being a decongestant in allergy medicine.

Fast forward to about 7 when my spouse got up for work and then being the hero that he is for his family, he swept off to Walgreen and came home bearing more drugs. I watched him admiringly as he poured some magical syrup into the little plastic cup.  Mattie would breath again! He kissed us all (by this time all three kids were awake and in our bed with me) turned on a movie for us to watch in our little cloud of a bed and left in a triumphant flourish.  Daddy had saved the day!

Fast forward another 1.5 when Paddington Bear was over and Mattie was moaning in agony about dying over Spring Break and how no one would know until they all came back to school and discovered that she wasn’t there.  I happened to be in my bathroom and while brushing my teeth, happened to pick up the “new” medicine that Brandon had brought home.  This whole time, I was under the impression that he had given her some sort of decongestant, because that is what we did not have in our house and that is what I had expressed a need for.  Instead, we were the proud owners of a new bottle of generic, Walgreen brand Zyrtec.  Zyrtec is a wonderful product and I highly respect those who created it, however, it has many of the same features as Benadryl or allergy medication out on the market, which is what the girl had already been dosed with.  And none of these two medications had any decongesting qualities.  Turns out that rather than make our daughter feel better, Brandon and I had just unknowingly began a little chemistry experiment with our kid.

The results of our little experiment showed that Mattie would most likely be a sleepy drunk person. She came downstairs and made a nest in the corner of the couch, jabbered something that none of us could understand, and then slept for the rest of the day.

I did end up making a run to Target to get that Sudafed because i figured when she finally did sober up, she was gonna be really mad that her nose was still stuffed up.  I also purchased the younger two kids a Play-Do pretend ice cream set.  That probably seems a little random, but they had actually seen it over a month ago and have been giving me not so subtle hints that they couldn’t live life without it.  For $12.99, an afternoon of keeping them occupied while I made sure Mattie was still breathing and actually getting to put away all their dirty dishes (kids living at home all day create a TON of dirty dishes) – it seemed like a great idea.

I never let my kids play with Play-Do at home.  Personally, I loved the stuff as a child and think its fantastic.  But after an unfortunate event that involved a lot of very bad choices on my eldest child’s part, I have banned it from my house.  And then when the boy got ahold of a tiny canister and decided to play with it in the car – I declared it dead to me. But this was supposed to be the most Awesome Spring Break ever, and with the one kid down and that kinda keeping us from going and doing and such…..desperate times called for desperate measures……and raising the dead.

One ticket to the children’s museum would have cost at least $12.99.  And then there would have been a squabble or two and the whole leaving thing.  My children often act shocked when we have to leave something that they are enjoying.  As though they had absolutely no idea that this was coming.  And even though they may have had a wonderful experience, suddenly all they can remember is what they either didn’t get to do and it’s the worst day ever.  And there is the gift shop at the end.  Why do all museums, zoos, grocery stores make it absolutely impossible to leave without first exiting past or through a little store of sorts.  I might be going to Target to buy a roll of duck tape, only duck tape, but I will inevitably end my time there prying a pack of gum out of my screaming preschooler’s hand as we wait to pay.

Back to the Play-do set…….there are hot pink accents ground into my kitchen rug now from an afternoon of making salty dough banana splits and sundaes……but it was so worth it.  I fed them Taco Bell, too.  I don’t think the younger two could have had a better day if I had rented a unicorn to trot them around the neighborhood.  And Mattie has no knowledge of anything that happened on that day so I’m considering that a win.

Gross Things For your Brain

At the rate I’m going, it’s going to be next years Spring Break by the time I finish sharing what happened on this one!  This is ridiculous!

Before I jump right in on our fabulous Tuesday……from two weeks ago…….I would like to show you what Reese came to the car wearing yesterday.  I am used to him wearing paper hats of sorts, there was a penguin around a month ago and that bear hat…..oh he wore that one out.  But this one just made me laugh right out loud.

“You’ll never guess what we learned about today, Mama!” No Reese, not in a million years.

“It’s not this color in real life though.”

And that was all he had to say.  Nonchalant and cool as a cucumber, like it’s no big thing to wear a paper brain on the outside of ones head.  He wore that through TJ Maxx, while I picked out thank you cards.  He and Mattie even got into a tussle and it was one of those mental picture moments for me – fighting in a store over who gets to touch a shiny box filled with stationary, calling one another horrible obscenities like”glass breakerer” and “baby hands” – the whole while, he was wearing a paper brain hat.

“Click” storing that little treasure away for the future.

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Sunday was soccer game day.  The boys won this time and I have to say, I was quite proud.  I always try to cheer and encourage, but not put too much emphasis on the actual winning.  I want the boy to actually know how to play soccer when we are done with this, that is my end goal.  But it does feel really nice when he scores, in the correct goal.  I think my favorite part of the day was when he and his buddy Ben were both sitting on the bench after a particularly intense 5 minutes.  They were hot, it being 80 degrees outside, and tired – and Reese just leaned over and laid his head on Ben’s shoulder, just sorting sinking into his friend beside him.

It only lasted a minute, because 6-year-old boys aren’t known for holding still for long periods of time, but I got to see it.  As a mama, I know I feel like it’s my job to shelter my kids, to be there when they are scared or sad or just tired.  And I think I’ve done a pretty good job at finding other aunties and uncles to also play those roles when maybe I’m not around or just in addition to.  But there is something very comforting in knowing that your Little Heart, has a friend out there – a person they weren’t obligated to, but rather was just drawn to, who likes to sit beside them and let them lean on them when they need a break.  I hope you boys always have each other, Ben and Reese.

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And I feel compelled to mention that yesterday my high was paying off one of Brandon’s student loans.  It was the smallest one, and there is still a doozie of one that will probably be around longer than we are, but still.  It is gone and I feel like Brandon now actually owns the “h” in Ph.D – the h because it’s not capitalized.  Those other two, much larger loans are the P and the D.  But I’m coming for you P and D, yes I am!

And one of my lows from yesterday was finding a tick on my body.  I thought at first that it was a scab, but quickly came to my senses when I reasoned with myself that there was no possible reason for me to have a scab right by my hip bone.  I removed said tick and then set it on fire.  That fire may have been unnecessary and a little over the top – but it felt like my only option at the time.

We went to the park on Sabbath for our annual Adventurers Spring picnic.  It was a lovely day, the kids scared all the fish that the poor fisherman were trying to catch, we may have photobombed a wedding party getting  their pictures taken and we learned that you can eat clover and pine needles should the need arise.  But we also learned that the ticks also enjoy being outside on a lovely spring day.  Or at least enjoy being on Baughwoman.  Lila had two ticks exploring her face/head during our short stay at the park.  Thankfully, neither of them had attached themselves, but it was still a little disturbing.

I don’t know if it actually helps (or is even safe, now that I think about it and am putting it out for all the world to see) but as soon as we got home I gave everyone a bath spiked with a hearty portion of Clorox bleach.  I also checked their little bodies over more thoroughly then I did even when they were born.  By the way, both of my older children have little freckle/moles in places that NOBODY ELSE better ever know about. EVER!

I have no pictures of our ticks or even our group of children, but here is one of Reese and the fish that he caught.

We saw a lot of commotion by the water’s edge, excited, tense commotion as all the kids grouped around Reese encouraging him with something he was very intensely focused on.  They we saw the triumphant arm shoot up, with this tiny fish dangling from his hand.  He had caught a fish! And that smile!!!!!!!! So proud.  He came marching towards our little pop-up tent of parents with his posse parading behind him.  I did the appropriate mother gushing, “Oh Reese! Look what you did!  That’s fantastic! Your first fish!!!! Was it hard to catch? ”

Turns out the fish was already dead and my son just felt compelled to pick its floating corpse up and out of the water.

Gross, that’s just gross.

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And because I have decided that the rest of my Spring Break will have to wait for tomorrow, here are my closing thoughts.

1) Target’s new paper bags make me feel just a little bit fancier than their old ones did.  Fact is, I rarely got a paper Target shopping bag.  I think it’s the twisted ropey, handle but can’t quite put my finger on it.  Regardless, I like it and will use paper from now on.

2) One of my daughter’s spelling words this week is mightn’t.  I don’t really even know what that means and wasn’t the least bit ashamed when she spelled it wrong for her pretest.  Another is glassful, not to be confused with glassfull.  That might not eve be a word, but glassful is.

So there, now you’ve learned something to make you smarter and something to make you feel fancier.  Have a great night!

The Zoo, Though It Is Free, Can Be Awesome…..and What My Children Are Learning At School

As any parent who has begrudgingly sent their child off to school knows, the silver-lining to sending your baby out of the nest before you were ready is all the wonderful artwork that comes home from Kindergarten.  There have been some real gems sent home with Reese and I have probably saved a few too many.  This little number is currently resting easy in my Top Five:

I had no idea how darling a paper bag Eskimo with cotton balls could be!

Definitely in the Top Five, maybe even Top Three, maybe even my favorite……and then this came home today:

Breathe out

Deep breath in!

My son has a new understanding of how the respiratory system works, ask him anything cardio thoracic related and he can rattle it back…..however, according to his awesome lung diagram, maybe he should consider a future in women’s health or possibly plastic surgery.

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My daughters are paying far less attention to their artwork these days and have instead taken to exploring our jungle of a yard in search of bugs.  Their father probably isn’t too keen on them taking apart the expensive rock wall he had built a few summers ago, but hey, you can’t put a price on education.  And getting girls excited about science, (though Entomology really isn’t a field I would be super excited about them falling in love with) well, knock down all the walls girls!  Take out the fence, too! I really don’t think their Nana had any idea how much they would actually use that plastic bug hunting set, but for the past two nights we have had new buggy tenants enjoying a little R&R in the Baughman Sisters B&B.  They are set free each morning…..probably only to be captured again in the evening.

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And back to Spring Break, as I would hate to leave the 17 of you who read this yesterday, hanging in suspense wondering just what we possibly did after I left you on Sunday. Like I said, the kids had in their minds that this little week off was supposed to be incredible.  And though I really didn’t have a good handle on what incredible was, or how to create it, I did know that Monday was the only day that we were guaranteed sunshine and if we were going to do anything outside, it probably needed to be then.  I decided on the zoo.

My kids love the zoo and we have a pass, which makes it free.  And that way, if I had to splurge on something later in the week, something awesome or at least something to keep them from killing one another, or maybe juvy bail money should things get really rough, I would have been thrifty for the first part.  I promised them each $5 to spend how they wanted and I then pulled out all the stops and invited their Aunt Shannie to come with us.  Again, I don’t have the knowledge of what makes a break from school awesome, but I do know that my children think that Shannie is awesome personified so having her there would be like my taking a handful of glitter to their day. We also invited our friend Ms. Kate and her baby Cassidy per Mattie’s request.  I love any excuse to hang out with my friend Kate and I don’t think we’ve ever gone to the zoo with Shannie, so this was a lovely treat for me, too.

Our time at the zoo looked a lot like this:

In the words of the great Taylor Swift, “And I had the best day with you today.”

Doing a little hand holding through the zoo with his best girl

It is said that boys grow up to be men and then more often than not, they marry someone who either reminds them of or actually is, very similar to their mother.  That would be lovely and all, but when sketching his heart’s ideal perfect wife, I think my boy will include many characteristics that he has seen in this precious woman.  I may have hung the moon in his world, but Aunt Shannie is definitely his sunshine.  It has also been said that one of the purest ways that we can tell our friends how much we love them is by loving their children.  I love you too, Shannie.

Lila has also recently decided that she is very interested in camels and made it very clear that she wanted to ride one.  She was absolutely elated when she discovered that this was an option and that hard(ly) earned $5 went to her camel ride.  Not the least bit afraid, and loving every minute of it.  So far, I seemed to be doing a pretty good at making things awesome.

Riding the camel, a dream come true!

So excited! I wish this picture had audio.

And then we bought icees.  I never buy them icees but this was Spring Break and I was breaking all sorts of rules.

This fountain calls to Mattie, it is her siren and we have never left the zoo with her not having to pass through it at least once

We had a great time with the girls and time just slipped away from us.  Before we knew it, we had about an hour to get across town to Reese’s soccer practice and we still needed to go home and get his gear.  We parted ways and I probably didn’t properly buckle my youngest child because we were in a hurry and she was starting to show the results of it being late afternoon and her not having a nap.  We were short on time, but I still pulled the car over and made the kids stand by the mural I see all the time and always say, “One of these days kids, I’m going to pull over and make you stand by that.”

The sun was in their eyes and strange men in the back of a truck with what looked like mannequin legs hanging out of it started making these weird noises at us…….but I love it.

Memphis is Tennessee and Memphis is home

We ended the first day of our awesome Spring Break (after Dad’s unfortunate, season devastating basketball game) at a local burger place in Overton Square called Belly Acres.  It has the funniest farm motif I have ever seen and their food was lovely – though I cannot in good conscience recommend the lentil and onion burger.  It’s not so much that it’s so bad, it just really isn’t as good as I was hoping.  Just don’t get it.  They have homemade ice cream sandwiches though, which sound fabulous and I can’t wait to try, but maybe sometime when I don’t have all three of my children.  They are wasteful and costly.  Maybe for a date night.

The girls loved that they had a tractor inside

Being so accustomed to Grandpa’s tractor in Poppy’s garage, it was the natural thing to do – just climbing right on up.

And Reese was just worn out by this point and glad he could sit down and watch ESPN.

Pooped!

Our first day was pretty fantastic, even if it was almost free.

The Beginning of Our Life-Changing Spring Break….I am being a little sarcastic here

I’m not quite sure what sorts of movies my kids have been watching, who they’ve been talking to or really where they received their education on Spring Break, but ever since they figured out that it was coming up, they have had very high expectations.  It has been the first question of every day since about mid-February, “Mom, what are we going to do for Spring Break?  It has to be amazing!” Sadly, what constitutes amazing to my eldest children is really hard to decipher.  Sometimes amazing can be as simple as letting them throw raw eggs at a chalk-drawn chicken on our back fence.  Sometimes things you think would definitely be amazing are a big fail – for example, our entire Disney World experience back in 2012.  Finding amazing was definitely going to take some creativity on my part.  Thankfully, I think I really hit it out of the ballpark on that first weekend so even if the rest of the week had been a complete disaster, I think I had earned a few mulligans.

So what was this amazing first weekend event?

Mumsey and Poppy came for a visit.

And they brought a brand new baby.

Sweet baby dreamy smiles

Some people rent jump houses or a petting zoo, maybe even one of those mobile game truck things – but my daughters would definitely agree that renting a newborn would be a real money-maker.

I don’t think we have ever had a baby this young (other than my own birthed from me babies) visit our house and Mattie especially, was in absolute heaven.  If you have a child who really likes babies and also happens to run on the hyper side, I would totally suggest finding a brand new baby to rent for a few hours or maybe a weekend.  Because Mattie wanted to hold the baby constantly and I forbid her to walk around with it or take it up to her room, she spent a lot of time just sitting quietly like this:

Her own little version of heaven

Even Lila insisted on having her turn, but wasn’t nearly as captivated as Mattie.

So excited!!!!!!

It doesn’t get much better than sitting with your Mumsey feeding a real life doll

American Girl ain’t got nothin’ on the real thing. Sorry Bitty Baby Clementine, the real thing is way better!

“What do you mean she’s not mine?”

And Reese, well he was thrilled to have his buddy Poppy here to play.  He could have cared less about the baby, though it did keep his sisters out of his hair, which was a plus.  He also loved getting to have Mumsey and Poppy there on Sunday to watch his first soccer game.  I think they enjoyed themselves, too.  And let me just say, if I thought Pee Wee basketball was entertaining, soccer just blew me out of the water.  The kids themselves are fun to watch, especially because they are just as surprised and amazed when they get a goal as we the parents are.  But even more entertaining are the parents – soccer parents are no joke!  Which really makes me laugh to myself because for something that is taken SOOOOOO seriously, I know of no one who as a young adult, was still incorporating their years of Pee Wee soccer into their everyday life.  Almost 75% of American kids play soccer between the ages of 5-10, but hardly anyone is still hanging on to that sport even when they reach their 20’s.  But there we are, parents yelling to our 6 year olds (I was so excited, I actually got to see a little boy chase a butterfly around the field) “You’re a brick wall! This is your goal, take it!” – by the way, that was not me yelling those things – so, so serious!  About something that really isn’t even going to be a blip on their life story.  Soccer isn’t even America’s favorite sport.  Not that we don’t love a World Cup, I’m not trying to hate on soccer by any means, but for as many little kids that play it as children, we sure don’t echo that support as adults.

Anyway, the whole game was absolutely hilarious and I would like to suggest to all of you to find out where 6-10 year old soccer is being played in your community and go there as often as possible.  Pick a team and become an honorary soccer parent, maybe even heckle that really “under armoured” out dad who does a little too much sideline coaching, the one who spontaneously yells to his 40 lb child, “It’s beastmode time!!!!!!”. Definitely heckle him.

Since every tied game deserves something special, we headed to a new frozen yogurt place near our house.  They didn’t have nearly as many flavor options as we are used to, but that doesn’t really matter as long as they have the right flavor choices.  And what they didn’t offer in yogurt flavors, they more than made up for in toppings.  Fact is, you could just forgo the yogurt all together and just get toppings and probably be happy.

“Food me, daddy”

Such a gentleman

She is very fickle with her affection, but when she’s feelin’ it she’s pretty intense

Please forgive me for not including a photo of Mattie, I certainly tried to take one but she was very into her yougurt eating and try as I may, not a one of them was really something worth sharing.  Some moments are best remembered by the expereince, not so much the picture that goes along with it.

We ended our day with a quick trip to Lowe’s to look at bathroom fixtures.  Brandon parked the car and told me he would meet me at the bathroom fixture section – instead I was found here:

I wonder if my neighbors would notice chickens in the backyard

Let me just tell you, chickens seem way more intersting to me than picking out a new sink!

We’ve Been Goldilocksed!

As usual, I had my entry all sketched out in my head a few days ago.  I may have even scribbled a few little tidbits down on a scrap of paper so that I could weave it all together to make a really juicy story – complete with pictures to illustrate everything.  I even have a few specific sentences, lines I want to make sure and use because they are so creatively thought out and well placed.  I will hang on to that piece of paper until tomorrow, what’s one more day going to matter anyway – because tonight as I write this at 11 o’dark at night I just finished remaking my bed.  It it wasn’t because I did laundry today and washed my sheets.

Today is April 1st, better known to some as April Fool’s Day.  To me, I will from now on refer to it as Take Away The Key To Your House That You Gave Your Friends Day.

Our day started out simple enough.  Lila woke up entirely too early, this being day 3 of Spring Break and all, and I spent a little longer than I would like to admit, snoozing on the couch while she watched Strawberry Shortcake on Netflix.  At some point, the other two woke up and joined us because I awoke to all of them fussing with one another.

I fed them and then I made sure they had clothed themselves.  Then i left them alone to do some quiet reading and work on their extra school work that they had requested to have during their break because they love it so much.  This way, I could easily hide the Easter eggs I had stuffed with candy the night before without their knowledge of the wonderful surprise that their loving mother had prepared for them.

That is a lie.

I did feed them and make sure they had clothes on, but from that point I think it became more of a threat that if they didn’t put away at least 6 of the 345 items scattered all over my living room and their breakfast dishes, I would walk across the street and hand the neighbor lady whatever it was that I had stashed in my bulging Target sack.  I think I even yelled something at them like, “Do not make me give away these eggs that I stuffed with candy for you at midnight to people I hardly even know.”

They cleaned up the living room and left me to hide eggs in peace, in my pajamas, in my backyard – with a cup of coffee in my hand.  It’s really a pleasant way to spend one’s earlier morning and I am going to make a mental note that when the kids are all gone to school, I will stroll my yard in my bathrobe during my morning coffee time.

I took no pictures of myself – you are welcome – but here is a little visual story of the egg hunt of 2015

Ready for the adventure

That mama, she’s so clever hiding eggs in trees

Mattie just discovered that the eggs were were haphazardly tossed all over – I may have become a little lazy there at the end of my egg hiding.

Buried treasure

I was very generous with the eggs in the monkey grass – Mattie discovered that, too

This whole egg thing was kind of a serious matter to some people

Lila talked for a good 5 minutes about that silly egg in the tire swing. Hilarious!

She had to go into the “woods” to get one

Reese discovered the monkey grass booty, too

Run for it!

Now fit over it!

And after they found all the eggs, counted them and sorted the candy, they spent a good hour taking turns hiding the now empty eggs for each other.  I have to say, of all the toys I have scattered about my house, the one item that seems to span the age difference and brings actual happiness for more than just a few minutes are those little plastic Easter eggs.  From now on, that is what I am going to give to every new mother as a baby shower gift – a big bag of plastic eggs.  It won’t really make any sort of sense at the time, but when she is on kid three and Easter number 10 and those eggs act as a white flag of peace.  For over an hour, my children played together, in harmony, without the aid of a tv or iPad – hiding little cheapy eggs all over my yard.  They laughed, and not actually at one another.  They worked together and the screams my neighbors heard were of the happy kind rather than the not so happy kind that probably get heard way more than I would like to realize.

After our egg hunt, I put actual eggs on to boil.

Some people have leg day, today was our egg day.

In the past, I have been a bit of a buzzkill when it came to egg dying.  It’s possible that I sucked all the fun out of it, trying to keep it as clean and tidy as possible.  Also, I may have been more concerned with making pretty eggs than letting them actually enjoy the wonder of the $1.50 egg dying kit.  This year, I did only what was absolutely necessary of me.  I boiled the eggs because stove tops and children are bad and I poured the vinegar into the cups, but only because they said it stunk and refused.  I then left the room to transfer Christmas pajamas out and put warmer weather jammies in – I find Passover week to be a good reference point of when it’s time to let go of flannel.  I like to make sure we get a good solid wear out of those holiday- themed jammies, so they get to stick around for a bit.

In hindsight, that complete abandonment may not have been the best idea.

Turns out, Lila dyes eggs with her whole fist and then tries to squeeze them dry.  There were no survivors in her little hutch of eggs.  But I think she at least enjoyed the experience during the moment and will hopefully tuck all that cracking away for next year and not make those same mistakes. Hopefully.

This pretty much brought our day to time for soccer practice.

When our home was left alone and unattended to.

I blame myself, because I never set the alarm.

I will always set the alarm now.

Always.

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We came home from practice to find this:

That is our train/coffee/NASCAR table that usually lives in the playroom – now sitting where our kitchen table usually lives.

And this is where we found our kitchen table:

It was a good 2 or so hours later that we made this discovery in Reese’s room:

That would be all of his wall art hanging upside down.

He thought it was funny, but somehow embarrassing and Mattie got very upset by the whole thing.

Mattie cannot take any kind of joke…….which makes it all the funnier when one is played on her.

And one was played on her, but there are no photos of that because she was angry.  I will tell you though that it involved rearranging the sheets on her bed and Brandon and I had a big hearty laugh about it.

Brandon then went in to our room to see what had been done to us.  He pulled the covers back and declared us okay, probably because we hadn’t made our bed in the first place he seemed to think.  This is the part of the story where I tell you, my audience, that my husband is a very intelligent man.  I will openly admit, he is smarter than I am and I have probably let my own intelligence slide a little in the past few years because I feel like he can handle the harder cerebral stuff for the both of us.  He has many awards and has his name on boards and lists of other important neurological people.  People pay him to think and he is allowed to tinker around with and make diagnosis about other people’s brains.  He is a very smart man.

But how he missed the fact that our box spring was now on top of our soft, pillow-top mattress – I have no clue.

This one was almost as funny as the Mattie one, maybe even more so because at 11:00, I was trying to lift my mattress by myself without knocking anything else or myself over.  That smart husband of mine had fallen asleep on the couch leaving me to tend to our little problem by myself.

So good job Uncle Chris and Aunt Shannie, we are assuming that this was you’re doing.  Nothing says I love you like a good tease resulting in a little unexpected late night bed making.  We love you, too.