Today is picture day.

Thankfully, this picture was taken yesterday morning when it was Spirit Day and the kids were supposed to be dressed as animals.  One little bit of parenting advice that I will happily share, as it has served me very well.  When your kids are about 6, invest in a really good animal costume – ideally something that doesn’t have legs that they can grow out of.  It’s been about 4 years ago that I bought Reese this bear costume and its come in very handy on a surprisingly large amount of times.  Granted, my children have been known to wear costumes as regular clothing, but even aside from that this bear suit has earned it’s keep.  And that bug/fly/mosquito outfit Mattie was sporting…..best $15 I’ve ever spent at Pottery Barn Kids!

My kid might be getting her booty handed to her in 6th grade as far, as schoolwork goes (that is a story for another day, but lets just say that if 6th grade were a knife fight, Mattie came armed with a popsicle stick and I would like my money back from 5th grade.) – but boy she can shine with school spirit!

Like I was saying earlier, today is picture day.  Forms came home about a week ago for us parents to fill out, kids name, grade, teachers name and any special instructions.  I quickly filled out my form and then found myself writing away feverishly in the special instructions, thankful that they had provided me this space  because the boy, especially, would need special instructions.  This is what I wrote on the form that went back to school and will be given to the photographer who takes my child’s 2nd grade yearbook pictures:

My mother’s heart prayers are along these lines today,”Please Dear Jesus, help Mattie to not be having a Science test today because that quiz broke her spirit, and as much as I want her to learn responsibility…..Please not today! And please help the photographer to follow the instructions.  Everything will be fine if he just makes fake flatulent noises.  Picture day is stressful for all of us. Amen.”

I have done my part, said my prayers, and now I will just cross my fingers and wait.

***

Yesterday was an exciting day…..even if it hadn’t been Animal Day.  First, it was the beginning of the hot lunch program at the kids’ school.  It only comes one day a week and it isn’t anything terribly exciting, but wow what a carefree feeling when I wake up and remind myself that there aren’t any lunches to be made that day! It’s the little things, people.

Our second thrill of the day came when we went to our fancy kids clothes store, home of all things smocked, monogrammed and giant grosgrain bows – to get a birthday present.  The store itself was having a birthday party and there was a full on petting zoo in the parking lot! This store is in a fancy part of town, in a fancy shopping center and full of things that are precious, but cost more than my children probably do……and they had goats running around in a sort of corral formed by a large animal trailer and an assortment of Range Rovers, Mercedes and Lexus SUVs.  Reese, of course, was weirded out by the whole thing and chose to sit on the sidewalk away from all the little kids and animals, but enjoyed glass after glass of complimentary lemonade. Lila went right to work on a forced binge these poor animals were being subjected to.  I truly hope those goats hadn’t been fed….ever…because the amount that my child alone was dishing out could probably fill up the crater that is in my front yard.  I expected Lila to enjoy herself, but I had no idea she would take her animal husbandry skills so seriously.  When I suggested we go inside to get our gift (after 17 glasses of lemonade for Reese and what felt like an eternity watching the little one force feed livestock), she glared at me with tears in her eyes and stated that “She hadn’t tended to all the goats yet! *Tended and mended are her two new words this week and it’s really funny to hear her talk about mending things in this very disposable society that we live in now in the 21st century* I told her to finish up, each animal only got 3 strokes though – she was brushing them with a rounded brush that looked just like the one I use to clean our toilet.  Apparently, the animals at Happy Times Farm travelling petting zoo aren’t picky about how or what they are groomed with….as long as it has bristles.

And Mattie, Mattie acted a little suspicious of the whole thing and I found myself actually watching her more closely than I was watching Bird.  She lingered especially close to this one particular pony, circling it at times and there was a lot of excessive hovering.  I wasn’t sure if she was having an Animal Rights moment and was considering freeing the pony or what.  She finally came over and informed me that she would like to ride the pony and since she has taken a horsemanship class, she didn’t see why this should be much of a problem.  I told her that I really didn’t think that was the best idea and since there wasn’t a handler over by the pony offering rides, we should just assume that the pony was only for petting and maybe the occasional sitting on for a picture. Sometimes I get the giggles at inappropriate things and times.  This was one of those times, out of nowhere it just struck me that we were in a parking lot full of children dressed in heirloom-looking clothing, sweating like little pigs and petting a trailer full of goats, and my preteen daughter was having a teenage moment, setting her heals in ready to battle with me about whether or not she should be allowed to ride the bow wearing pony around the parking lot.  Why was it wearing a saddle if it wasn’t meant to be ridden? This was an exact quote, “It’s sending a mixed message, mom!”

Thankfully, there was birthday cake inside the store.  If only all confrontations, battles of the will and other uncomfortable situations could have a cake escape option.

***

And our final exciting event came right after dinner.  Reese was walking upstairs and realized that a giant box had been delivered on our front porch.  Packages are a very big deal around here because they don’t show up all that often and I guess because we just get excited VERY easily.  Even when we know it’s just new air vent filters or something, that moment of opening is just as enjoyable as if it were an anxiously awaited birthday gift. Fleeting, but for that tiny moment, just as exhilarating.

They brought the box into the kitchen and began cutting into it.  Lila stood on the table screaming because it was all so incredible.

Better than when the PlayStation was unwrapped, probably not, but still pretty high up there.  One of Brandon and I’s very first large purchases was our first house.  The next very mature and adult seeming purchase was an 8ft privacy fence.  We followed that purchase up by bringing Crosby home the next day, puppies need fences.  And about a month after Crosby settled in, we purchased our Dyson “Animal” vacuum.  It probably cost more than the dog and the fence and I remember being on a payment plan for it.  That was 14 years ago.  Our Dyson worked harder than anyone else in this family, sucking up probably 500 boxes of Cheerios, the equivalent of 50 full-grown yellow labs (in dog hair), 25 sand boxes and 12 sets of Legos. We aren’t even given to talk about the Ark that it could fill up with “Mystery Mess”. It was time to retire our old friend.  Brandon and I took turns vacuuming, one doing the work and the other standing back watching in amazement. The biggest kid actually got her feelings hurt because we used it while she was in the shower and she didn’t get to watch.

I plan to use the new vacuum as leverage for whoever gets their piano practicing done first this afternoon.  And maybe if Mattie can get ahold of those grades, she can be rewarded with getting to detail my car all by herself.  Aim high little lady!

Happy Thursday!

Potluck, Again

Today is going to be one of those potluck posts where you will get several very random little bits of things, and none of them will really go together, but it’s stuff that I want to share and want to remember.

It’s been a while now, 11 days to be exact, but back on September 1 Memphis had a big ol’ party celebrating 901 day.  September first also happens to be the area code around here and I guess it just seemed like it would make a fine day for some city pride.  There was a huge event downtown at our minor league baseball stadium, with lots of local groups,charities and organizations getting the chance to share with their community.  And there was also a local celebrity kickball game.  I think kickball is a lost sport.  My children have never played as far as I know, but back in 1986-1994 it was a constant in children’s lives just like pb&j.

My children were thoroughly entertained by the spectacle going on out on the field.  Yes, that would be Elvis out there playing (he was shortstop)….I said local celebrities, remember and you can’t get much more celebrated or local than the Kind himself.

Reese and Lila were very excited to get to meet Rocky the Redbird, giving high fives and Lila stroked his fury beak for an awkwardly long amount of time.

Mattie had no real interest in the costumed bird, but her curiosity was peaked when Lila asked to go and say hello to the Grizz Girls, our local NBA team’s cheerleaders. They happily obliged when I asked if I could take a picture of my girls with them.

It wasn’t until I was back at my seat and looking at my picture that I realized Lila had a giant lollipop stick in her mouth.  Maybe not the best photo taken of any of them, but it captures the memory nonetheless.

We had a great time and felt an extra dose of pride in this city that has welcomed us and made us its own.  I recently saw this quote about Memphis the other day and I think it sums things up perfectly.

“If you’re here long enough you get to the gold beneath the grit, and then you fall in love with the grit itself.”

***

This box arrived in the mail the other day.  It is addressed to my husband, but it is from Kate Spade and I’m pretty sure that I have a pretty good idea of what is inside of it.  I’m also pretty positive that it isn’t actually for Brandon, but is instead for his wife who has a birthday coming up here soon.  It’s been driving me crazy and he finally moved it, but now that is driving me crazy because I don’t know where it is and should there be an emergency, I won’t know how to rescue it.

***

And while we are on the subject of bags, I was at Target the other day and saw that they have the cutest paper bags there!  I have never actually received my purchases in these bags, always the white and red plastic ones, but these are just adorable to me! Okay, maybe the side with the single “Bullseye” isn’t incredible and the parts that advertise the Target Redcard distract.

But this side, I would totally reuse that as a gift bag! Don’t be surprised if come Christmas, there is a tribe of these babies under my tree tied with green ribbons.

***

Lastly, I will leave you with a sweet picture of my everyday ManCrushMonday

Happy week before my birthday Friends! Be productive and nice to each other.

It’s The End of The World

Two things I never thought would happen in my life have actually happened in the last three days.  I was awakened by an earthquake rattling the walls and the chimes in my mother’s grandfather clock banging against each other Saturday morning.  Not having any real experience with earthquakes and initially assuming that what I was experiencing MUST be a tornado because that’s what makes walls shake and rumbling sounds in Northwest Arkansas, I was completely confused when I jumped out of bed and found a perfectly lovely day.  Craziest thing ever and I was pretty sure there for a bit that this was the end of the world.

And when I thought that things couldn’t get any battier, I found myself taking a relaxing soak in my jacuzzi tub this evening.  That one might be a head scratcher to some of you readers.  Most people soaking in their own tub in their own house isn’t a crazy life experience.  It is, however, when you have had your life tied up in a plumbing stand-off between crooked plumbers, your home warranty and your extended home warranty for 7 months.  I have had a total of 8 different plumbing companies come to visit my home on multiple occasions, usually without first announcing their arrivals.  I have been promised things (lied to) and had a huge crater dug in my front yard.  We shut the door to our downstairs bathroom the second week of february and haven’t set foot in there since.  It isn’t drama free yet. I still have a few more dates with my new besties at Snyders Services, and I’m pretty sure that when I let the water out of my tub tonight, it just flowed freely out into the yard – but I’ll take what I can get.

***

On another note, I have a child who I am at a loss with.  She’s not a naughty girl, she’s not a malicious girl, but sometimes she thinks this is her world and we’re all just livin’ in it. She gets frustrated quickly and annoyed on the turn of a dime.  But our biggest issue lately has been a lack of respect.  I’m sure she isn’t the only 11 year old who has no problem using their siblings things, but refuses to share anything of hers with anyone else.  I’m probably not the only other mother out there who sometimes wonders if the child would sell their siblings for more “stuff”.  Their things would be saved from a burning house before their sister.  If you have sweet little toddlers, you will have no idea what I’ve talking about.  And if you have teenagers, you are probably laughing hysterically at me and thinking “just wait sister, this is only the beginning”.  Mattie and I actually had a conversation the other day that went a little something like this,

Mattie: (in a very sarcastic, sassy tone) “I bet Mumsey never did anything like that to you!” ( I may have just snatched her new water bottle away from her and tossed it out the window *I would also like to say for the record that I went right back and retrieved said water bottle so as not to be a litterer, but in her mind it is gone forever. I would also like to add that I had asked her repeatedly to please remove said water bottle from it’s location on my console in the car because I didn’t want it to spill.  At the time of my tossing the water bottle out the window, it had just spilled all over the console and covered my phone in a wave of gatorade.  There was absolutely no concern about my phone or the fact that it went completely blank.  The girl had just ruined my phone. After I had said very nicely, several times to move the water bottle.  But I was the monster for chucking the water bottle out the window.)

Me: “I bet I never acted like this to Mumsey!”

*What Mattie doesn’t know is that I was a very difficult toddler, famous in several states for my horrific tantrums, and I probably lost my parents several friends during those early years.  But I have never given her attitude since I have been over the age of 4. Anyway, the final straw came not this past Sunday, but the Sunday before.  I don’t even remember what it was this time, but Brandon and I had had enough and knew that we had to do something drastic to get her attention.  Before you judge me here and throw out all these ways how what I’m about to tell you really wasn’t the appropriate action, let me say that I agree with you.  I have no idea if this was a good idea or completely ridiculous, but it felt like we needed to at least do something.  We had taken away privileges, she had endured hours of my lectures, and her phone and computer have been gone now for weeks already. She’s only 11, so it’s not like she has a big social life and it didn’t seem fair for her teammates to take away soccer….plus we have already paid for that.

So we took away everything else.

Because she seems to put more value on her things, than the feelings of those around her…..the things would have to go.  I stripped her room of everything else except for the essentials.  Her cozy bedding and lovies she likes to sleep with.  Her lamp and pictures, even the artwork on her walls and especially her library.

It’s up to her when she gets it back, when we start seeing a change in her attitude towards the rest of us and a respect for the things and feelings that are important to them – she will start getting her room back.  I have no idea if this was a good idea, but it definitely got her attention.

I’m also amazed at how even though she has nothing in her room, it can still be a mess.

I also want to share this photo because it makes me smile.  This little girl, with all her thought and preteen emotions, will frequently spend her rides home from school staring out her car window trying to escape from and ignore her younger siblings.  On this particular day, she was especially annoyed at the rest of us for doing who knows what and had turned to her faithful window.  She sat there, staring out and sulking…….with a pipe cleaner horn attached to her head.  I have no idea if she was trying to channel her inner narwhal or unicorn and I didn’t dare ask.  Honestly, I’m not even sure she realized it was on her head, but it is exactly the mental picture I will carry forever of my little girl on the cusp of her teenage years. Do not mention this photo to her at all should you ever see her or we will all be in trouble.

What’s Right In Front of Me Part2

It seemed a good time to share another edition of “What’s right in front of me” , where I share a picture of what is directly in my line of vision at the moment…..or a few moments ago (days). I have said before that my children love LOVE costumes.  Over the past 4 years that this blog has been around, there have been many photos of my children doing routine, ordinary things while sporting less than ordinary clothing….like a bear suit. The costumes are getting smaller, but my children wear them just the same.  Pottery Barn Kids, why don’t you make your seasonal costume collection in middle school sizes? So without further ado, this was my view while sipping my coffee and trying to talk to my mom on the phone:

No big deal, just a giant insect casually lopping through my entryway.

Happy Thursday and Happy 901 Day! We Memphians are especially excited for today because it happens to be our area code.  I’m pretty sure that means there will be fireworks tonight.

*** As a side, the wings of that bug costume used to hit right at his wrists about 10 minutes ago…..he’s metamorphisising right in front of me!